ViCasting.com

Here's a new demo from a band I'm currently fronting. Go visit us at asimplecomplex.com or myspace.com/asimplecomplex.

Turning 33, and regressing more and more each day. Yikes.

Fuck.

Okay, so then all I have to do is renew it, right? No, in redemption status it would cost about $200. Okay, so then all I have to do is wait until redemption status is over and buy it at the rock-bottom, blow-out, super-crazy low price? I mean, who the hell wants my stupid domain?

Oregon Names LLC, that's who. They registered it this morning.

Fuck.

I don't know a hell of a lot about this company, except that they exist primarily to snatch up domain names, and they do not sell 'em.

Fuck.

But I do have a phone number, and an address, and a name - mine. I am, after all, B. Jason Ouellette, and that has to mean something. It's not as if this is some wacky domain I failed to trademark, it's my fuckin' name. If they don't acquiesce, then I don't know, maybe our attorney can do something. But, and this is what really chaps my ass, it may end up costing more than the $200 I was reluctant to pay in the first place.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. Moral? Stay on top of your domains, kids. This is awful. This is a name I've invested a lot in. I've been recording under this name for a while now. I was planning to finish a record under that name by next summer. I'm getting despondent, and I'm a real greenhorn when it comes to this interwebs thingy. I feel slighted, and I'm mega-bummed. I don't know what to do.

Fuck.

Do your own research.

myspace.com/bjasondotcom

God help us Jesus, God and Baby Jesus help us.

Well, the building we were living in got bought by a company that turned it into a condo development, who then paid us to move. So we've moved across town into another apartment that is better and costs less.

I call that a bargain, the best I ever had.

So what else, then? Lisa had a fall-down-go-boom in December, and is going in for her fourth knee surgery in May, her second as a result of the fall. We'll say no more about that at this time.

Lisa and I have decided to have one child only, and since I'm not thrilled about Lisa taking the pill, I'm getting snipped in about two weeks. I taped the consultation a couple months ago, I should post it sometime.

Iain is balls-deep into the terrible-twos, and is having no difficulties asserting his individuality with the old flesh. We got him a new toy piano (a rather robust piece of musical equipment for a plaything), and he plays the hell out of it. Can't help but smile.

I'm always doing crap on the computer, but I'm not sure about the future of DAGNABBIT! I'm doing other things, like theme songs for other podcasts, and recording stuff for some new radio personality, trying to get his new show off the ground. We'll see how it works out.

Until next time.

HUMAN BEING.

Some time passes...

You know what? We should start sending shredded Arnold tapes and DVDs to Sacramento. That sounds like fun. I think I've got a copy of True Lies hanging around here somewhere.

dagshow@gmail.com

bjason.com

Stick your pin in our FrapprMap!

Yesterday, Lisa went to the Yankee Candle flagship store in South Deering, Mass, and brought back tons of goodies.

Today, we went to see Goblet of Fire, and it was incredible.

Ragan Fox can fuck straight off.

So we've got a new one.

A better one.

You can now call us on the TAINT-LINE!

That's right, you can now call us at 206-33-TAINT!

Holy shit, I'm 31 years old, and I still think words like 'taint' are funny. What the hell's-a-matter with me?

We sample the Jones Soda Holiday Pack, and lament our lame Thanksgiving at Fratello's. But my folks save the day with a big parcel of sumptuous leftover turkey!

Our call-in line has disappeared, but we're working on getting a new one. Love you all, Kiss-kiss.

- J & L & I.

Today, Lisa takes the reins for a while as she goes under the knife to have her breasts reduced from a DDD to a C.

Part Two soon.

One really feels like chattel when you think that shit like this could possibly be happening here, and not in, like, some backwards nation. But in many ways, I guess we are in the most backwards nation of all.

We use death to punish killers, and somehow our type of death is more righteous and humane. This flies in the face of all reason and sanity and ration. It's government-sanctioned insanity. It's fascism. But of a kind that I would chance to say is even more deeply insidious that fascist nations of the past. This is so disguised and camouflaged under the guise of Christian values, helped along by a largely complicit and mostly indifferent media. We are a people overloaded with more access to information than any civilization in history, and most of us just do not care. It's a maddening, saddening state of affairs we've gotten ourselves into. And I almost believe that it is irreversible.

Sorry. I'm off today and doing laundry while I slowly go insane.

New episode soon, I promise.

FREE FRANCES!

Rock on, Mr. West.

DAGNABBIT! is now big time.

How do I know this?

Because we're getting comment spammed buy some jagoff Texas Hold 'Em poker outfit.

What a pain in the ass.

This episode, Lisa and I enjoy a lovely Ordway's lunch at a park near where Lisa works in Bow. We discuss the minutiae of the day, and gaze lovingly into each other's eyes.

MUSIC by the George Garabedian Band and Ministry. Rant by the imcomparable Francis E. Dec.

"Un chien andalou" is actually only 75 years old, and it was made by Salvador Dali. But a chick does get her eyeball sliced open. Yummy.

Work is still insane, and it's getting hard to keep up on shows. Getting an iRiver at the end of the month and hopefully it will help. Podcasting is something that I really love, and not being able to keep pace with the shows I love is something of an annoyance.

Oh, well. Who knew I'd make it to 25?

Anyone out there handy with code feel like helping me out with designing the site to look less... generic? I've not got the time, talent or ability to whip this thing together.

Please, somebody, anybody... PIMP MY SITE!

Fuck the notes, here's the show.

Music from Commodore Vic LLC and The Kinks.

Our life is a fucking sitcom.

We'll see. Warts and all, this is podcasting.

We take Iain to the Livingston Park on a beautiful Sunday, whereupon he promptly illustrates how negligent his dumbass father is.

Music from KMFDM, Ben Folds, and Frank Zappa with Sting.

Music from Big Black, Pat Benatar, and Adrian Belew.

We're going to try and up the production schedule to two shows a week. We'll see how it goes.

God.

My cousin, David, sent me this link for a "male restraint device" while we were IM-ing a few nights ago.

Click it at your own risk. They do show it "in use."

Hmm... now I know what I'd like for Father's Day.

An XBox, you assholes.

This is a very long show, the longest yet. Seventy-three minutes. Lisa wouldn't let me wrap it up, and she was bugging the shit outta me. That's why I had to kill her. Sorry.

The new pope, our banged-up kid, the cat that belongs to the ages, handcuffs as a discpline strategy for kindy-gartners, our homophobic president holds hands in the garden, getting flipped off in traffic, post-coital cleanup and much more.

Music from Meryn Cadell, The Doves, Elvis Costello and Spookey Ruben.

Big-ups and thanks to Adam Curry for running that promo. Just drop me a line, and we'll arrange for that knob-shine. Let us know where and when, and which one of us you'd like it from.

(Pick me! Pick me!)

And a huge steaming pile of mucho thankos to Scott Fletcher for that friggin' voice. God damn, to have nuts like that.

And thanks to you guys, for coming back again and again and keeping it fun for us.

'Cept for you, CW. You're a cunt.

This is a song I recorded for Lisa on Mother's Day last year. Thought I'd share it. It's one of the very first things I did on GarageBand. Iain provides the squeals and giggles. Everything else is me. Enjoy.

I'm going to pick on a Christian Creep, and see if he'll (these ARE mostly guys, after all) respond in that typical verbose, smelly, scripture-laden way that is just so fucking entertaining. I'm not even going to get embroiled in any substanive argument in which no one will be a clear victor. I'm sooooo sick of those ideological ping-pong matches. The goal here is ridicule. Nothing more, nothing less.

So, without further ado, on to our first subject. CuttingEdge.org is a wild site, chock full of insanity regarding Biblical prophecy, the New World Order, and really tasty articles about how, for example, Hilary Clinton is a practing Satanic witch. Awesome! This site is just funny, funnier than your blog, funnier than that drunk uncle that pulls quarters from your ear. It's also scary as blood in your shit.

I just sent the supposed propreitor of this lovely idiotic god-rag an email, with the subject line, "Just letting you know." The body of the message is, quite simply, "You are a nut. That's all," and a quick plug for the podcast.

This is gonna be some fun.

More details when we record episode 15 tomorrow night.

Until then, more coughing uncontrollably until I vomit in my mouth. Yummy.

I hope to god this is an April Fool's joke, but I don't think it is.

Technical Questions

1) Would I be better off with Wordpress or Radio?
2) Can I make this Movable Type allow people to comment on comments like with the livejournal?
3) Is there a firewire or some kind of audio card for my g4 I can buy that will allow for high quality audio without causing terrible latency problems like with the iMic? Currently I use the line-in but the quality suffers.
4) Can someone reccomend an inexepensive mixer that will allow me to have three line inputs, 2 mic inputs, 1 photo input, cross fade, panning, master volume, and especially the ability to listen with the headphones to the cueing chanel or the master output. What I would really love would be one of those old-fashioned boards with the round pots.
5) Can someone please send me an old 3rd gen iPod so I can put linux on it and use it as another audio source for my show? Even if the battery is dead it's OK.
6) Whose vagina smells worse than mine?

Posted by madge at March 4, 2005 12:45 PM

Here's what I do, and it works tits:

Use the computer only as a source, running it and all your other sources, mics, turntables, etc, into a mixer. I like my Behringer Eurorack, but I'd love a Mackie if I could afford it. You may need a separate phono pre-amp for the vinyl.

Send the program signal to a CD recorder. I use a Harman/Kardon unit.

Rip the CD to an MP3 via iTunes, and proceed as usual.

No latency problems, no hiccuping bullshit, and you'll always have an umcompressed 44.1kHz 16-bit physical master of the show on CD. Easy-peezy. Computers are still fickle and unpredictable, and will always find a way to get you shit-flingingly pissed-off. At least this way, you'll feel more comfortable recording with real audio gear than with a bunch of exotic and esoteric programs.

Don't get me wrong: I love my computer, my breakout box, and my GarageBand. But only for production pieces and short take stuff, not for hour-long "live" podcasts. Depend solely on the computer and it will eventually break your heart. What we do is essentially radio. The gear and production should resemble that of a economically reasonable studio setup. Maybe I'm way old school, but I think depending on one machine to process vocals, sources, Skype calls, compression, signal routing, EQ, mixing, web browsing, email retrieval, any other computery meshugass, and actually recording the damn thing, is a recipe for profound frustration.

That's my two cents.

And:

It's probably a toss-up between Star Jones-Reynolds and Greta van Susteren.

But:

3rd place is definitely shared by Ann Coulter and Michelle Malkin.

Posted by: B. Jason Ouellette at March 4, 2005 05:35 PM

Jason- that sounds like a good solution except I don't have the CD recorder. My current mixer already has a phono in, so I'll just stick with it. Also, I already use two machines. I use one for itunes, quicktime, skype (source material) and the other one for recording only.

Posted by: Madge Weinstein at March 4, 2005 06:25 PM

That's a great setup.

Posted by: B. Jason Ouellette at March 4, 2005 06:50 PM

Hmmm.... maybe I ought dust off my old iMac G3 and get it repaired...

Opening tune is "Fastest Growing Sensation" from our House Band, SH-5. Go give 'em a hand. Job.

We visit with Lisa, who is out having her tresses prettied. Then we hear Adam Curry being super-domestic and noisy. I still think the only way podcasters will make money is by creating a network. Individual podcasters charging subscriptions or (god help you) 99c per episode wil just piss people off. The best shows will have to link arms and work together. ONE reasonable price, SEVERAL high-quality shows every day. Charging will also make podcasts accountable for both quantity and the quality. Gone will be the days of doing it when you feel like it.

I bitch, once again, about iPodderX and their lack of action regarding this show. Whatever.

Whole Wheat Radio gets a reaming. Audio Magazine, my ass. Jimbob just hates the word "podcast" because he didn't think of it 2 1/2 years ago. Bohemian nudnik. Oh, by the way, if you're thinking of complaining, remember:

This is only a character.

The first Cover Request debuts! See the post below for more info. And send me your requests! If I like it, it will be in the next show.

DIALOG is a podcast subscription you really need to pick up. We hear a few clumsily selected clips.

Enjoy. And love thy neighbor. Just don't get caught.

We discuss: Our broken elliptical and how to get the most from an extended warranty, the Paris Hilton hack, our evil pet cat, Bagoo, my raggedy asthma, Rick's nippelganger, piercings, the Beastie Boys and Talib Kweli, Ron Jeremy's weird body hair, the Cookie Bouquet story, Alton Brown, the sage/pot story, Lisa criticizes my driving and shuts me down on the reverb/background music debate, Sean Kennedy's NewsReal (a great podcast, BTW), Lisa reveals her political tendencies (right-wing fascist), the tollbooth story, our vacation plans, and another Podcast Alley appeal.

Any folks of Indian descent who are offended by Lisa's horrible remarks can complain here. And I apologize profoundly.

This show also features the music of that late, beloved, misunderstood genius, the great Wesley Willis.

AND, I got my birthday sex, in case you were wondering.

Take charge.
Move out of the parents' basement in your soul.
Give a shit.

New show tomorrow.

Promise.

Maybe I'd like an ASCAP license, after all.

I want to start taking requests for unconventional piano bar songs. I play "Someone To Pull The Trigger." It's by Matthew Sweet.

I talk about my mental short-circuiting, podcasts I like, and a bunch of other shit that I can't quite recall.

Call the LISTENER LINE at 206.666.DORK!

Someone in the comments noticed my email's not linked from this page. Here it is. Until LibSyn's new blog engine is up, this is the best I can do.

Features music from Eskimo Laboratories, including Ed In The Refridgerators, and Harry And The Potters.

Go visit Scott Leffler's website. He's got a really good podcast.

AND DO ME A BIG FAVOR: Normally, I woudn't give a flying rat's ass about this, but go to Podcast Alley and kick up a little buzz for this show. It's kinda dismal right now.

And as of this afternoon, I am still not showing up in the iPodderX software aggre